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Personality Research articles on personality

7Dec/130

Mating-centric vs. Spartan Personalty Spectrum

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The Mating-centric mindset is one of external narcissism. The identity (while often not conscious) is fixated on resembling a mirrored reflection of what is considered most ideal/attractive by society, one's preferred subculture, or ideal/preferred mate. Money whose only meaning is it's universal acceptance as an instrument of value is naturally more prized by the Mating-centric, physical beauty and youth even more so. The Mating-centric male/female wants to be the ideal male/female, a desirable Adonis/Aphrodite of their world if not the entire world. This is what drives the wealth inequality phenomena, why when one person builds something of no practical value to existence like a 200ft super yacht, someone else will want to build an even less practical 300ft one... why people obsess over their figure, bank account, ranking, even their children's success.

This is why a Mating-centric person may not want to be friends with anyone so attractive they might attract/steal their significant other. This is one reason someone with a stronger Mating-centric orientation would be crushed with a romantic relationship not working or ending because it undermines their sense of who they are, which is their value/attractiveness as a mate. This is why someone might not want to admit their flaws or simply be dishonest/lie (to a partner, others, them-self), if the truth could render them less attractive, less mate worthy, or a lie could render them more attractive, more mate worthy, why their mate attractiveness could become more important, more of their identity, than anything else at the cost of much of an internal, self understood identity (likes, talents, memories that are not dependent on a connection to particular mate or their ability to attract one). And because the Mating-centric drive is driven by a desire for externally activated physical pleasure, Mating-centric types are more likely to have unhealthy relationships (addictions) with any external thing/behavior which could replace the physical feeling of high mating value (alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, gambling, gaming, spending, thrill seeking behavior, etc.). In fact, I can't remember a time I didn't feel like a king when smoking crack (I haven't really smoked crack but that would be a relevant example if I had and if you were amused, I was able to dishonestly ingratiate myself to you, raising my mating value to you.)

The counter persona to the Mating-centric is the Spartan personality, the internal narcissist. The Spartan shuns external ideals, pleasures, and the need to find validation in mate value (how attractive one is to others). The quintessential Spartan prioritizes being them-self, being content, without regard to social rejection/value or external pleasures (money, luxury, etc.). Many new ideas have historically come from Spartan intellectuals (which not all Spartans are). Many Spartans are no less foolish in their life choices than Mating-centric types who lazily adopt whatever is popular/attractive. Sometimes one is justified in having a more Spartan approach, like Aristarchus who figured out the Sun was the center of our planetary system 1800 years before Copernicus readopted the idea and proved it. However, the idea that an individual is going to be more right than everyone else on every question is subjective bias/insanity just as always erring on the side of what's popular is populist bias/insanity.

The whole underlying psychology of this orientation spectrum is how much one (consciously or unconsciously) overvalues or undervalues mating. The Mating-centric will predictably make choices which maximize their genetic reproduction/survival (prioritizing the sum of how attracted they are to others/someone plus how attracted others/someone are to them), the problem with that being, the person who best reflects the sum of attracted to them + attractive to them will not always be the same over time. The Spartan, more free of romantic preoccupations, focuses more on whatever their internal interests might be. They are less likely to physically reproduce but more likely to have a fully developed internal self and thus more likely to produce ideas/work valuable to society/culture. The problem is that since they are less connected to others, their ideas/work may never reach others / the world. This is why a Spartan and a Mating-centric pair can work very well together, Steve Wozniak and Steve Jobs being a good example.

The dangers of an overly Spartan existence is that physical attractiveness does correlate to health to a fair degree, so to shun that compromises your ability to be physically happy. Also, having a partner/mate can help you stay healthy, live longer, according to research studies. The dangers of a Mating-centric existence are many. Sacrificing (failing to develop) an internal identity as a result of focusing too much on how to be/stay attractive to a mate/mates, infidelity as the prioritization of the physical best and/or who values you most causes you to sabotage/stray from perfectly workable relationships you already have, having more kids than you or the planet can happily sustain (or even unhappily sustain), the aforementioned growing wealth inequality problem caused by unconsciously or consciously trying to maximize mating attractiveness in oneself or one's descendents.

The true Spartan cannot really maintain healthy relationships as they are too unwilling/unmotivated to connect to, interact with, others. The true Mating-centric can't either as they are chronically disappointed with how attractive their partner is and/or how attracted their partner is too them (and will similarly often not stick with hobbies, careers, friendships, long enough to develop ones of any depth). Only individuals balanced, or who work to develop a balance, on this spectrum are capable of achieving long term relational (as well as hobby, career, friendship) happiness, being happy with enough and turning it into more, as well as seeing the world with a more balanced perspective between internal and external truths (both of which inevitably stray to some degree from objective truth). To become balanced, healthy, the Spartan must get over the fallacy that relationships and being attractive to others is unrewarding and the Mating-centric must get over the fallacy that their value lies in their mating attractiveness. When a Spartan can be comfortable in a relationship (rationally and emotionally) and a Mating-centric can be unphased by romantic rejection (rationally and emotionally) balance has been achieved. It's also possible to be emotionally/unconsciously Mating-centric and rationally/consciously Spartan, or vice versa.

http://research.similarminds.com/the-motiv-personality-system/588

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